Sunset at Rodeo beach

有些话，覆水不可收，宜深思之

There are times when you say things you know you ought not to say. Once it comes out from your mouth, the damage is done. There is no way to reverse it. Only a time machine can do that. The only way is to seek apology and deal with the consequences.

I said many wrong things today. I hope the damage is not fatal. I hope I still have the chance to pick up the pieces and rebuild it.

Ideas that are dangerous.

Ideas are dangerous. Sometimes, so dangerous that you are not willing to keep it in your heart. They are dangerous because I see its potential to change the world. I happened to stumble upon one today.

I do not bother to sleep. Because I know I can't sleep.

When you have an idea that you believe can change the course of history.
When you have an idea that has potential to change the way politics are run and the way businesses are conducted.
When you have an idea that you think can change how humankind think.
When that idea sinks deeply into your head.

You just can't sleep.

It's too cold. We started a fire today at my home.

The young boy and the sea

Wondering what is my true nature is a subject that has been occupying my mind for quite a long while. Today, I have found something very interesting about myself: I have a strong affinity to the sea. Why? Probably because I believe I come from the sea. I mean this in the cultural rather than the evolutionary sense. My ancestral homeland is an island that faces the vast South China Sea. My hometown is a seaside town next to South China Sea. My grandparents traveled across the South China Sea to go to Malaysia. My grandmother nearly drowned in the sea. In fact, my feeling for it so strong that I am to be given the chance to decide how I am going to be buried, I will choose to have my ashes spread into the ocean.

The sea, with its vastness and indifference, never fails to remind me of my insignificance and the impermanence of my life. I will never get a response when I shout at it. I will never stop the waves from pounding the land. If the sea can talk, it is probably telling me "no matter what you do, you will never be as great as I am. I am permanent. You are nothing." That's why when I am troubled, the place that I always to be at is the sea. Because when you are in front of a thing of such great magnitude, all your troubles and concerns seem petty and worthless. Standing in front of it, all my worries evaporate within a short instant. When I first went to Singapore at the age of 12, I was terribly homesicked. My favorite place to go was always the Chinese High terrace, where I could look at the vast expanse of empty fields, because it reminded me of the sea.

Back to the reality, I drove to Stinton beach today. The drive and the seaview along the way was marvelous. I enjoyed myself thoroughly today. If anyone of you comes to visit, I will definitely bring you there.

Figuring out what to do

Having fun

Standing on top of a cliff, overlooking th pacific ocean

Reflections on a cold night

The temperature is 11.9 Celsius. I am very tempted to switch on the heater. But the unfortunate thing is that the heater in my house is centralized. I am given the choice of heating the whole house or heat nothing. It probably makes more sense to wear a few more layers.

I have settled down quite comfortably in Milpitas, California. It's a nice place to live in. Great weather. Great sunshine. I remember how it felt like when I first arrived. I was partly thrilled by the place because it was s something foreign and fazed by the place because I was not sure what to expect from it. I faintly recall the excitement that I felt when I found my apartment, when I got first car and when I got my first paycheck. In essence, it was the kind of things that you experience when you move into work life. I was fortunate to be able to experience them in advance.

But when the passion dies down and the monotoneity of working life sinks in, I can't help but to question myself what's the point of life. I have gained an awareness of the fact that I will be entering another phase of my life in probably two year's time. I know it will be like a rollercoster ride. Once it starts, it will be hard to get out. When I graduate, I'll most likely get a job, join the workforce and become a productive member of the society. After a short while, I'll probably get a car, financed by a car loan. With the car loan, I'll find a new motivation to work. A few years after , I'll probably purchase a house, financed by a house loan and form my own family. Then, I'll find more motivations to work. Soon after that, I'll have my children. More motivations. Soon after that, they'll need education. More motivations. Soon after that.... More motivations... Soon after that... More motivations.... until one day... death... or if I am lucky, retirement.... and then death. Here goes the life story of Mr Set Ying Ting. I know I am probably simplifying things here. I've heard people saying things about the joy of having kids, the joy of sharing your life with a partner, the satisfaction of becoming a homeowner, etc. I tend to think that a simple life is probably the most happy life. But I know there's something in me that strongly resists the temptation of such a life. A life without a meaningful cause? A life that is too typical? A life that fails to bring out the best in me? I can't really articulate the dissonance that is gently shaking the core of my soul. Not long ago, I declared to everyone in this blog that my life is a fire that burns. How boastful. How shameful. Now, my life seems more like a puddle of dead water than anything else.

At least, I am realizing that on a cold night like this. On a cold night like this, when my deepest and darkest feelings roar, when my soul's yearning for the salvation is stronger than ever, when my domesticated heart seeks to untame itself, when my suppressed mind revolts against its self-imposed chains, I feel I am inching closer to something. What's the thing? That's a very good question. Please make a guess.

Something familiar from home

Homecooked chicken rice

Feast

Updates from Silicon Valley

I'm living in Milpitas, California. Life is going well.

My housemates. Picture taken in San Francisco.

Our 3-bedroom apartment. 

My little private corner.

Kitchen. I'm learning how to cook.

I'm taking a photo at the balcony. In the background is a beautiful mountain.

My Car

After searching for full 3 weeks, I have finally found my car. My babe, which I will drive for one year here.

It has a sexy butt. 

Equipped with a 3.0l 210 hp V6 engine, used by Nissan 300ZX or Fairlady Z

 and nice curves

Infiniti J30

14 Days in Europe? Feasible? Have i missed out anything?

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Between existing and living

This was a speech made by Pulitzer Prize-winning author, Anna Quindlen at the graduation ceremony of an American university where she was awarded an Honorary PhD.

"I'm a novelist. My work is human nature. Real life is all I know. Don't Ever confuse the two, your life and your work. You will walk out of here this afternoon with only one thing that no one else has. There will be hundreds of people out there with your same degree: there will be thousands of people doing what you want to do for a living. But you will be the only person alive who has sole custody of your life. Your particular life. Your entire life. Not just your life at a desk, or your life on a bus, or in a car, or at the computer. Not just the life of your mind, but the life of your heart. Not just your bank accounts but also your soul.

People don't talk about the soul very much anymore. It's so much easier to write a resume than to craft a spirit. But a resume is cold comfort on a winter's night, or when you're sad, or broke, or lonely, or when you've received your test results and they're not so good.

Here is my resume: I am a good mother to three children. I have tried never to let my work stand in the way of being a good parent. I no longer consider myself the centre of the universe. I show up. I listen. I try to laugh. I am a good friend to my husband. I have tried to make marriage vows mean what they say. I am a good friend to my friends and they to me. Without them, there would be nothing to say to you today, because I would be a cardboard cut out. But I call them on the phone, and I meet them for lunch. I would be rotten, at best mediocre at my job if those other things were not true.

You cannot be really first rate at your work if your work is all you are. So here's what I wanted to tell you today: Get a life. A real life, not a manic pursuit of the next promotion, the bigger pay cheque, the larger house. Do you think you'd care so very much about those things if you blew an aneurysm one afternoon, or found a lump in your breast?

Get a life in which you notice the smell of salt water pushing itself on a breeze at the seaside, a life in which you stop and watch how a red-tailed hawk circles over the water, or the way a baby scowls with concentration when she tries to pick up a sweet with her thumb and first finger.

Get a life in which you are not alone. Find people you love, and who love you. And remember that love is not leisure, it is work. Pick up the phone. Send an email. Write a letter. Get a life in which you are generous. And realize that life is the best thing ever, and that you have no business taking it for granted. Care so deeply about its goodness that you want to spread it around. Take money you would have spent on beer and give it to charity. Work in a soup kitchen. Be a big brother or sister. All of you want to do well. But if you do not do good too, then doing well will never be enough.

It is so easy to waste our lives, our days, our hours, and our minutes. It is so easy to take for granted the color of our kids' eyes, the way the melody in a symphony rises and falls and disappears and rises again. It is so easy to exist instead of to live.

I learned to live many years ago. I learned to love the journey, not the destination. I learned that it is not a dress rehearsal, and that today is the only guarantee you get. I learned to look at all the good in the world and try to give some of it back because I believed in it, completely and utterly. And I tried to do that, in part, by telling others what I had learned. By telling them this: Consider the lilies of the field. Look at the fuzz on a baby's ear. Read in the back yard with the sun on your face. Learn to be happy. And think of life as a terminal illness, because if you do, you will live it with joy and passion as it ought to be lived".

The new MP for my area - Tony Pua Kiam Wee

薛语录

I dislike hypocrites. Yet by judging them, I cannot help being one.

我曾相信，看透自我，能使我摆脱愚昧，随而超越自我。可往往我有限能力谨能让我看清自己的不足与无能，却无法促使行动上的提升。这真是一种可悲的无奈！